All good things must come to an end...

I'm ending this adventure. Due to some other personal matters that need my attention, I cannot commit  to completing the remaining dares by my deadline of 8/28 (birthday). I apologize if your dare was not done, and I will try to remain open to doing it at another point in my my life.

Thank you for your creative ideas and endless support. I hope at some point I can return the favor. If you've been reading this through the last 18 months, you are aware that there have been a lot of changes, challenges and contemplation on my part. In the end, the only thing I know is consistent in my life is that I never could have imagined where it has taken me thus far, and I'm not able to imagine where it'll take me from here, regardless of my intentions.

I have a 76% success rate, which puts me at about a C-. Luckily, I don't need this to get into a competitive Phd program, so I am satisfied to settle at a mid grade effort.

So the final tally...

Dares received: 29

Dares completed: 22

1. Create a blog
2. Wake up everyday and smile and stretch
3. Get highlights
4. Relax and sample new adventures (on the cheap)
5. Go to a drag show
6. Complete this puzzle
7. Fund-raiser walk
8. Paint a portrait of someone I love(d)
9. Read a fiction classic of at least 300 pages
10. Become a raw food believer for one week
11. Visit my parents in Bellingham
12. Join Match.com for one month
13. Volunteer with a cause you believe in but gets you out of your comfort zone
14. Say hello to strangers
15. Run a 10K
16. Visit the geographic center of the US
17. Take a mud bath trip with my sister
18. Streak nude (you'll see)
19. Read two books by Truman Capote - ok, so I only read one
20. Take a belly dancing class
21. Begin a spiritual journey
22. Ride to the last station on every line on the T

 

Dares busted: 3

1. Visit Wenmiao/The Ghost Market in Shanghai
2. Dance on the Bund with a local Shanghainese
3. Engage Lola in a dog sport or train her to be a therapy dog

Dares abandoned: 4

1. Get 100 people to say thank you
2. Zipline with Anne Essaran
3. Skydive
4. Enter a dancing competition/dance off

  

Ride to the last station on every line on the T (Kim Courtney)

Well, well, well, my dear friend MBTA, we meet again, but this time it is to fulfill a dare from my transportation planner cousin. I have lived in Boston over 6 years and have been on each T line, but I can't say I've been to the end of each. This is such a great dare from Kim, and it has reawakened my curiosity about my everyday surroundings.

For anyone not familiar with the T. The T is the MBTA (Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority) and has an extensive history, which I could not so justice in a summary.

Blue - Bowdoin - This is the closest T stop to my office and is open during business hours.

Blue - Wonderland - coming soon...

Green - Lechmere - I lived two blocks from this stop with Dennis. I love the EC and if I pause, I can still hear the screeching of the train rounding the corner in my head.

Green (B) - Boston College - After countless moments of my life wasted... the B line finally ends. Last stop, is mostly for BC students, which are tame after suffering through stop after stop of BU students.

Green (C) - Cleveland Circle - Steps from this stop is the reservoir with a great flat path for running/walking/pondering.

Green (D) - Riverside - The D line is a long long line, but a beautiful ride. The tracks disappears behind trees with quick peeks to beautiful, private yards in expensive Newton homes.

Green (E) - Health Street - There is not much going on here, except that it is the closest stop to my friend, Robin's house. So actually, I guess that means there is a lot going on here.

Orange - Forest Hills - My first winter in Boston, before I registered my car in MA, I drove to Forest Hills to park my car and commute into Chinatown. Now that I've been here a while, a trip to Forest Hills usually means the start to a long stroll tracing the old E Line tracks down Center Street or a visit to Arnold Arboretum.

Orange - Oak Grove - coming soon...

Red - Alewife - Well, this is essentially a parking lot for commuters, but if ou walk throught he office park, you can find Summer Shack with its super tasty lobster rolls.

Red - Braintree - coming soon...

Red - Ashmont - This stop has been completely remodeled int he past couple years. I noticed that last time I was there Ashmont Station now has a sign that says "Ashmont/Peabody Square". Hello, gentrifcation, your train has arrived.

Red - Mattapan Line - Mattapan - coming soon...

Silver - Dudley Station - Where do I start with Dudley Station? It is changing and has a bad rap. Take it from someone who has stood out there regularly, trouble finds trouble; I'm not trouble, and I've never had a problem. The great thing about Dudley is it is close to good eats - Silver Slipper and Haley House. If you are looking for an excuse to go there, these two places could be it.

Silver - Airport - Been here, done that, hope to get back to it real soon! Perhaps to come to Seattle for a visit, cousin.

April Dare Count

Seriously, where did April go?!

Dares received: 30 

Dares completed: 21

1. Create a blog
2. Wake up everyday and smile and stretch
3. Get highlights
4. Relax and sample new adventures (on the cheap)
5. Go to a drag show
6. Complete this puzzle
7. Fund-raiser walk
8. Paint a portrait of someone I love(d)
9. Read a fiction classic of at least 300 pages
10. Become a raw food believer for one week
11. Visit my parents in Bellingham
12. Join Match.com for one month 
13. Volunteer with a cause you believe in but gets you out of your comfort zone
14. Say hello to strangers
15.  Run a 10K
16.  Visit the geographic center of the US
17. Take a mud bath trip with my sister
18. Streak nude (you'll see)
19. Read two books by Truman Capote - ok, so I only read one
20. Take a belly dancing class
21. Begin a spiritual journey

Dares busted: 3

1. Visit Wenmiao/The Ghost Market in Shanghai 
2. Dance on the Bund with a local Shanghainese
3. Engage Lola in a dog sport or train her to be a therapy dog

Dare on Deck:

1. Get 100 people to say thank you
2. Ride to the last station on every line on the T

Begin a spritual journey (Julie Ellis)

I'm on it, Jules. Thank you for opening the space for me to reflect and giving the permission that I sometimes need to focus on matters not tangible. I'm not finished with this and don't intend to be, but as one of the dearest people to me, I will keep you posted along the way, and I look forward to hearing about your journey too.

Reflection: Are you a human being or a human doing? 

These words have haunted me for 13 years. I returned home from my first year at college and met with a woman I considered to be mentor and unconditional supporter. We sipped coffee and caught up about the events of the preceding 9 months. Topics included: starting college, surviving the freshman dormitory, losing my driver’s license for too many speeding tickets, starting a job as a chemical dependency counselor, making dozens of new friends, and volunteering in my new found community. I found myself busier and more active than ever. It was good time in my life. Then, she posed the question – are you a human BE-ing, or a human DO-ing? I froze. I had never considered that there is a distinction. My eyes teared up, and she probed deeper, questioning what in my life was solely for me and allowed me space for reflection and appreciation. Our conversation continued, but the question was never fully resolved for me. At 31, after 13 full years of living since then, my mind often wanders back to this question. Am I human being or a human doing?

More often, I silently, shamefully answer – DO-ing.  There is guilt that I keep busy and do not leave much open space. Although I would consider most of my tasks worthy activities. There is personal judgment that Be-ing would be the preferred way to live. Wouldn’t everyone want to be in the BE-ing category? So, I kept the question and my DO-ing to myself. Although as I age, I see my true nature more and although I cannot fully understand it, I can accept it for what it is. Without shame, I am a human being that is doing. In my doing, I express my being. In action, I confirm and shape my inner being.

I am not through wrestling with this question, but I can say today I am no longer haunted by it.

March Dare Count

March is a crap shoot - will it be the end of winter, beginning of spring or somewhere in between with damp rain? March 2011 did not disappoint; it was a little bit of all of the above. However, longer, brighter days with the promise warmth motivates me to look back at my dare list and push on. The countdown is still on!

Dares received: 29 

Dares completed: 20

1. Create a blog
2. Wake up everyday and smile and stretch
3. Get highlights
4. Relax and sample new adventures (on the cheap)
5. Go to a drag show
6. Complete this puzzle
7. Fund-raiser walk
8. Paint a portrait of someone I love(d)
9. Read a fiction classic of at least 300 pages
10. Become a raw food believer for one week
11. Visit my parents in Bellingham
12. Join Match.com for one month 
13. Volunteer with a cause you believe in but gets you out of your comfort zone
14. Say hello to strangers
15.  Run a 10K
16.  Visit the geographic center of the US
17. Take a mud bath trip with my sister
18. Streak nude (you'll see)
19. Read two books by Truman Capote - ok, so I only read one
20. Take a belly dancing class

Dares busted: 3

1. Visit Wenmiao/The Ghost Market in Shanghai 
2. Dance on the Bund with a local Shanghainese
3. Engage Lola in a dog sport or train her to be a therapy dog

Dare on Deck:

1. Get 100 people to say thank you
2. Ride to the last station on every line on the T
   

Some of the remaining dares need to wait until it is a little warmer before I can just knock'em out... but I'm feeling inspired to make some goals I can work on now that will pay off by the end of the summer. If you are curious, have tips or want to want to help make it happen, here are my spring/summer goals:

1) Finish the backyard landscaping - that's right the trash pit in the back yard will finally be leaving! Imagine raised beds with homegrown veggies, a dining area, bird feeders and relaxing place to end a summer day.

2) Run a 10 consistent minute mile - I'm still running and have a few 5Ks and 5milers scheduled for this summer, but I want to get to the finish line faster. For everyone who was with me after the Southie St Pat's 5K, let's hope this doesn't encourage more sneezing. 

3) Climb the rock wall at the gym - I am thrilled with the new community center across the street and the fitness center inside.  I could sing all its praises, but one thing that I am looking forward to trying is the rock wall. I've never done any climbing and I just want to try. However, I need to bulk up my arm strength before I can go there. I'm working on it!

Take a belly dancing class (Maryanne Courtney & Bev Scott)

Yes, yes, yes! I tried to start this in January and then put it off, scheduling, snow, excuse, excuse, excuse. When my friend, Anne, mentioned that her East Boston YMCA offered belly dancing, I jumped on it. She tried it once and was willing to go back. I was definitely in.

My experience...
I loved it! Everyone in the class was so upbeat and had different skill levels, so it felt very comfortable. I learned some new tricks, like how to shake my chest by only moving my shoulders and how to punch with my hip. I am still working on my "shimmy". I am definitely shaking it, but if what I am doing is actually a shimmy, I just don't know yet. I will keep working on it. It was an abdominal workout, but it is so much fun I just wanted to keep twisting and isolating. I am glad that this was a dare, and I got to share my first belly dancing experience with Anne.

I know Maryanne is planning on taking this up after her big spring work push is over. I highly recommend it and look forward to hearing how your firs class goes. Good luck; shimmy, shimmy, shimmy!

Thanks, y'all!

Engage Lola in a dog sport or train her to be a therapy dog (Karen Courtney)

So many options of what to do... and I failed...

Ball = mine

This was one of two dares from the same person, dearest sister, and I know that I just cannot commit that time in such an organized fashion.

Lola is a free spirit and I believe her heart's desire is to play fetch with me and chase other dogs in the dog park.  Although I will take this chance to show case my favorite Lola moments....

She has got "sit" down.

Halloween romping with Gus

Fetch!

 

 

 

 

 

Read two books by Truman Capote (Marge Benham-Hutchins)

Two... I read one book by Truman Capote, In Cold Blood.

This was my second reading dare. That post describes my feelings about reading, so I won't bore you with repeating the details. Keeping that in mind, please know that reading fiction is truly a challenge for me, and I have encountered many friends that believe that if I would just read an inspiring book/author, I would embrace fiction. I just cannot say that is the case with me.

However, I am happy to say that I have made my way through one more fiction book. Yes, I do consider Capote's true crime genre fiction. By making it through one more book, I now have one more topic to fall back on during cocktail hour and that is success for me!

Thanks, Marge, for challenging me to try again!

February Dare Count

I'm not feeling the typical tally this month for a couple of reasons:

1. I accomplished nothing on my list this month.
2. I feel more compelled to express myself.

To address reason number one, I am working on one dare, but cannot yet claim the dare as completed. I also dared myself to keep running. The 10K dare became a springboard and gave me  confidence to say yes to running a 5 mile race over Memorial Day weekend. I put my running shoes back on and have been dodging icy patches for the past couple weeks. Finally, some of the other dares are better suited for warmer weather (see: skydiving and zip lining).

Next, I am on to my compelling need to express. The past couple weeks have been darker than usual for me. While typically a month thought of for lovers, February, for me, brings an anniversary of sexual violence (if that's a surprise, remember this dare's blog post; I'm a trendsetter, Scott Brown). I can never predict how I will handle this each year. However, I found myself this year too tired from an overbooked schedule and too weary from snow shoveling to squelch my darker reflections. Dark reflections and a [somewhat] active dating life are not a good combination.

I have been confronted/comforted by lots of friendly advice:

• There is someone for everyone.
• You have to kiss a lot of frogs.
• There is a lid for every pot.

This advice is heartfelt, but given by those who know just as little about the way this works as the friend consoled. Truly, it is my fault for asking. None of us have a crystal ball. It is an unfair position for friends. I'm sorry to those that I've tortured with my whining this month (oh, and all those other months too).

Regardless, I am feeling brokenhearted and mourning the fullness used to be here. How could this sneak up on me over a year later when I was coasting along so well?! I guess that doesn't really matter, but what does is that I know what type of partnership I want. I am remaining hopeful, although presently deflated, that I will get what I want in life even if statistically that isn't logical. My dare to myself, in addition to running 5 miles in May, is to remain hopeful, even if my optimism wanes.

DARE: Be hopeful; logic be damned.

January Dare Count

Dares received: 28 

Dares completed: 18

1. Create a blog
2. Wake up everyday and smile and stretch
3. Get highlights
4. Relax and sample new adventures (on the cheap)
5. Go to a drag show
6. Complete this puzzle
7. Fund-raiser walk
8. Paint a portrait of someone I love(d)
9. Read a fiction classic of at least 300 pages
10. Become a raw food believer for one week
11. Visit my parents in Bellingham
12. Join Match.com for one month 
13. Volunteer with a cause you believe in but gets you out of your comfort zone
14. Say hello to strangers
15.  Run a 10K
16.  Visit the geographic center of the US
17. Take a mud bath trip with my sister
18. Streak nude (you'll see)
    

Dares busted: 2

1. Visit Wenmiao/The Ghost Market in Shanghai 
2. Dance on the Bund with a local Shanghainese

Dare on Deck:

1. Get 100 people to say thank you
2. Read two books by Truman Capote
3. Take a belly dancing class

2011 has begun and I am embracing it without hesitation. The biggest gifts I received so far this year are words or encouragement and praise come from unlikely messengers. Thank you (you who know who you are) that have shared with me that this dare process has been "empowering", "inspiring", "fun" and "bold". 

I reached out in complete fear to find something to hold onto. How it became such a positive experience, I am unclear. However, I do believe that when I am earnest with my intents, positive reactions result. I love that this was a positive experience for me and my friends. None of this could have happened without your participation and encouragement. 

A special thanks to Marge and Maryanne for getting those last two dares in under the wire. As of January 31st, 2011, I have accepted all the dares and will be completing the remaining dares by my birthday - August 28! 

Lola and I are full speed ahead into 2011!

Streak in public (Kate Floyd and Paul Proto)

Let me start with, we are no longer friends (kidding). On the serious side though, I cannot streak nude. I like my public sector job, and to keep it, I think I need to exercise good judgment and not streak. I am going to consider this dare complete by doing something that I thought still had the essence of running around like a fool.

Today, I am an L Street Brownie! Submerging myself in icy cold harbor water is an awesome way to jump start the new year. Yes, I know it was unseasonably warm today, but know that the water was not.

A super, special thanks to Logan and Brian for doing this for the SECOND year in a row... and when I lost my shoes in the harbor went back in for a SECOND dip to retrieve them for me! Brrr...

You rock, and I'm a wuss. Once in 2011 was enough for me, but I'll see you there in 2012!